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When I was 18, my girlfriend got pregnant. I was so embarrassed because I never thought that would happen to us…We were just kids—we didn’t even know how to take care of a baby. Abortion was definitely something we considered, but we eventually decided against it. We went ahead and had the baby, and even though my girlfriend and I didn’t end up getting married, I have an amazing time as a father to my now-11-year-old daughter. (A dad)
Let’s face it—when we have sex, we don’t always think about everything that might happen as a result. And even if you’re careful most of the time, something can still happen that you didn’t expect…something like an STD or an unplanned pregnancy.
When I was in my early twenties, a friend of mine got pregnant by her boyfriend, but he never knew it. She decided to have an abortion without telling him. She told me a couple of years ago that she regrets not getting more information first. (A friend)
Guys, the problem is a lack of communication. If your partner doesn’t know how you would react if she got pregnant unexpectedly, or if she doesn’t know that you would be there for her, it’s easy for her to respond out of fear. The decision about what to do is hers by law—but be a man and don’t abandon her to deal with it alone or just tell her, “Whatever you decide is fine with me.” Let her know you’re ready to find out about the options and work through this situation together.
At the age of 28, I married a beautiful woman who had been born because of an unplanned pregnancy. Her birthmother was a college student, and decided that the best choice for her was to let her baby be raised by a couple who hadn’t been able to have children. (A husband)
Fellows, if your partner gets pregnant, there are three basic choices:
- Continue the pregnancy and parent the baby
(whether or not the two of you decide to get married).
- Continue the pregnancy and make an adoption plan for the baby.
- Terminate the pregnancy.
If you and your partner are making this decision now, make a visit to Blue Ridge Women’s Center part of the process. They can verify that she’s really pregnant, and use ultrasound to find out whether the pregnancy is viable and how far along she is. They provide accurate information about all of the options, and a wide range of support services. Blue Ridge Women’s Center has more than 20 years of experience with over 14,000 women and couples, and all of that expertise is available at no charge to you, thanks to generous funding from the community.
Hi, my name is Steve, and I am the dad, the friend, and the husband above. If you and your partner are facing an unplanned pregnancy, make an appointment at Blue Ridge Women’s Center so that you can equip yourselves to make a decision you won’t regret.